Malingering’s World

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ban on white

petition for the ban on white pants

Why, I ask, do people do this to themselves? Was there not one second in this woman’s entire life where she thought “maybe I should see how this looks from behind” and then utilized one of the tools we have as human beings (mirrors and other reflective surfaces) to examine the situation? Please don’t start this “she doesn’t care and that’s so awesome, she’s so kewl” business because you know damn well that she cares about what she looks like, otherwise she wouldn’t have gone to the trouble to spend 14 minutes this morning greasing herself up to wriggle her body into those pants and then exhale as completely as possible to empty all reserve air stores to close the button, nor would she walk around with a large mass of non-breathable material wedged up into her asscrack likely causing chafing in rather painful areas. No, if this woman truly didn’t care about how she looked, she would throw on something that fit, a pair of Uggs, and head on out the door. This, on the other hand, is what is perplexing.

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