So, I am still doing Crossfit despite realizing its similarities to cult phenomena and trying to sift through the many testosterone-driven egos surrounding me. I think my motivations have changed just a bit, as I am learning to be more of a self-absorbed narcissist bitch to enhance my survival. So what if sometimes I work […]
We might as well start making shirts that says “everyone loves an easy girl” or “everyone loves a blow job (and I don’t charge much)” or even “everyone loves taking advantage of the insecure and intoxicated fools who stumble around at 2am after the bars close and they’re still looking to get laid.” Or maybe […]
As you can imagine, tying a shirt like that leaves plenty of opportunity for boobie to poke out the neck hole, etc. I’ll let you use your imagination since this isn’t a $12.95 XXX site.
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There is no reason to attract attention to the ass of a 3 year old unless you are looking for assistance with a diaper change or the kid needs a good honest spanking. What’s next, pasties for kindergarten? There could be a whole line of pasties, 26 in all, to help the kids learn the […]
The strange thing about this one (which differs from all the others) is that the intended recipient does not have the same last name as me. It’s not even close.
Hi David*!
Well, how was your trip back to TX? Sure hope coming up was helpful for you in anyway at all. Perhaps just seeing […]
Now that I am forced to explore the interstitial cystitis road, I’m trying to understand what is upsetting my bladder so much. The next suspect: my workout shorts.
I overheat when I work out. I turn bright red and sweat like a maniac and get blotchy. So I try to wear as little as possible when […]
Getting a Garfield tattoo on your tit is probably a bad idea.
Actually, putting any newspaper comic strip character on your boob is questionable. Can you imagine the surprise of your lover when, upon removing your shirt, he is faced with a grinning Dennis the Menace? Or even worse, Cathy with her pudgy little fingers gripping […]
Move over, Alyssa Cougar-Vagina Milano. While you have helped kill the careers of 3 different major league pitchers, my mere presence makes rookies hit their first major league home runs.
You may think I am speaking out of my ass, but I have photographic evidence that my cheering and incessant encouragement has helped every one of […]
So over the past 3 months it appears I have developed interstitial cystitis (a.k.a. urethral syndrome and other things). For those of you fortunate enough not to know about the joys of the IC, I will tell you. It’s sort of like having a UTI, but without any bacteria to kill. You have to pee […]
I mean, life is shitty and dramatic enough, but now I’m getting sucked into these strangers’ problems too. I’m feeling really awful for poor Betty and family.
Of note, I later got several e-mails from “Martha” inviting me to come stay with her, even though I told her I wasn’t “Bob.”
names have been changed to protect […]