Malingering’s World

That doesn’t mean it has to beat your wardrobe! Fashion yourself a new pair of tights with some yarn! Your wallet will thank you!

What a great invention. I always wondered why people didn’t invent those sponge and soap ice skates that Tom and Jerry used to wear, so I’m glad the current footwear trend of huge, obnoxious ridiculous boots has lended itself to function. Dust your floors, mop up spills, clean under the couch, all with a little shake of the leg. Genius.

Since their feet grow so slowly.

I really hope these are coming into fashion. It’s like MC Hammer but capri style, which is totally more awesome. And then we can show off our ankle-bandage sandals, which are good for support and bedazzling. HOPE AND CHANGE PEOPLE. Bring it.

This sight makes me sad. She was all excited to put on those 4 inch black and white patent leather heels and showcase them on 3rd Street Promenade knowing full well that they perfectly complemented her Sephar bag, and then she got a blister and had to carry them around all day walking in her barefeet trying to avoid puddles of dog pee and loogies while she window shops. Another dream, crushed by harsh reality.

There is something about a 1 inch strip of calf hair that is really a big turn on. Too much hair and you’re overwhelmed and lost in the bush, not enough hair and you feel like you’re a pervert because you’re looking at some prepubescent leg. But just that one inch peeking at you, and what seems like only you, that’s fucking hot.

This is for Wskrz. She thinks going barefoot is super sanitary and a great idea. She likes sucking people’s toes after they’ve walked barefoot through large shopping areas. It’s really gross but we don’t say anything because she’s Canadian.

Or something of the sort.

Just a reminder to you ladies out there that no matter how cold it gets, there’s no excuse for not succumbing gender roles and wearing that skirt, so I don’t want to hear it.