Malingering’s World

But that doesn’t explain the man crop top, does it?

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Today I learned that one is not “allowed” to take photos of any buildings in downtown LA. I objected to security that this was not legal, and they said “it’s not about it being illegal, this is private property and that is our rule, because of 9/11.” So then I pointed out that we were […]

The thought of keeping an upholstered chair in a public restroom sort of grosses me out, because I still think back to those 20/20 specials where they went around a hotel with a light to expose all of the proteins and bodily fluids on the surfaces, and this one is in a place where pretty […]

“honey, do you have a napkin? i spilled my mocha ice blended on the dog again.”

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As if MILF wasn’t bad enough, now we have to take it one step further? Damn you, American Pie. Damn you.

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This woman (presumably, mother) decided to take baby and stroller on the escalator (despite the elevator a mere 20 feet away) and ended up spilling 2 lattes (on herself, not the child) which she had in the cup holder up at the top near the canopy. Then she went fumbling around trying to catch the […]

Why do we have to fall back? Why? Who are the assmunches who think it’s a good idea to waste sunlight at 6am? I am too damn grouchy when I wake up to enjoy “light.” Why can’t we save some for after work, when the normal people are awake? Damn you, fall back.

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1) My pussy has not gone to waste, though it is rather large
2) I like capitalizing random letters in sentences
3) Self-esteem is relatively non-existent here
4) I don’t mind being seen as nothing but a wet gaping hole
5) If you have a dick, I’m game
6) Money isn’t a terrible thing to waste, considering I bought this […]

Apparently yesterday there were open call auditions for Janice Dickinson’s model show on Oprahs’ TV network. Now I don’t know Janice Dickinson’s life story, and I didn’t read her book but what I do know is that she has had a bazillion plastic surgeries and she brags about all of her sexual conquests and all […]

This jackass realized she missed the entrance to the mall (yes, the damn MALL), and rather than waste valuable shopping time to go around the corner to the other entrance 100 feet away, she made an illegal U-turn (which turned into a 7 point turn thanks to the lack of turning radius on the school […]